OMG BTW. Fucking Christmas day. Had a good haul this year. Mapex MPX Steel Snare. Really loving it. Went and had a practise and I'm not sure whether it was the new snare (I think that will have helped, it's in much better shape than my old one!), or just the fact I hadn't played in a couple of days (I always find that I improve more in the time I don't play than the time I do... Have you figured out if that makes sense yet?), but anyway I had an amazing practise. Just seemed to be pulling shit off. Played along with Sound of Muzak and just felt a whole load more comfortable. It's a good feeling.
Aside from that I got CDs (completed my Taylor Swift and Owl City collection ha!), clothes (cool new jacket from Dan and Linzi, cool t-shirt from them too that apparently only cost about £1, socks and boxers - much overdue! Boxers were also from Dan and Linzi and are funky and colourful which is great - been meaning to get more colourful underwear haha), drum sticks as per, 'Funkifying the Clave' - looking forward to getting into that! Anything else?... Genesis book - another Dan poundland gift. I doubt I'll cover-to-cover it but I'll def give some of it a read.
It's been a good day. Quite empty though without a family get-together. Missed seeing Ally and Linzi and Auntie Anne and Uncle James but they had to spend time with Anne's mum given recent events. Still got to see Papa, Uncle Richard, Rae and Sophie, and Uncle Robert who was there during the day and that was nice. Tuned Sophie's new guitar for her ha. Really hope she does grow up musical. I'd be happy to give her lessons - would make me feel better about the amount of money they gave us this year! Andy and Lou came up this evening. It's nice seeing them for a while but I don't like having company for long spells and they do tend to stay a while. I like getting on with things. There's always stuff to do. Practise etc. I'm sure you'd still agree. You should work your ass off but never try too hard right?
Speaking of which I'm gonna have to get back to doing college work. Nearly finished that essay on minimalism. Wanted it done by Christmas but never mind. Will def be done by new year. That's another subject in itself. Don't know what we're doing for it yet, starting to look like it'll be Lanark or possibly Livi if we sort that out soon. I don't mind either way. I've never actually spent New Year out in Lanark so I'd be up for it really. Marc isn't, but as long as we're all together that's what matters. Kind of have this feeling we might end up not being though. We'll see. There's another reason why Lanark could be alright but I never feel like I can really talk about that here in case this does end up getting read by other people. Still with a little prod I wonder if you can think back to what your situation was regarding girls around now. I wonder how that's turned out? Probably shite. Still have that feeling that I wasn't made to get girls or for relationships. Things just don't seem to work out for me.
Anyway, I've digressed. Back to the present. Gonna get these assignments done and out the way asap, then likewise with the rest of the degree. I just wanna get out and play, write songs and perform and try and get somewhere. It's all I wanna do right now and although my voice is totally gone right now - sore throat! - I think's it's improving cos I'm practising constantly, and I don't wanna stop. I also think my songwriting could be worth something. I get a lot of ideas, just don't get the time to develop them, and I wish I did. I really feel like if I had the chance to take some time to just write and play I could get somewhere. I guess we'll see. For now, let's get this (rather pointless) degree out the way.
Tuesday, 25 December 2012
Monday, 17 December 2012
18/12/12 - about 1am
I've not done as much tonight as I'd have liked - a typical problem with evenings in the house for me, particularly when Football's on TV. Arsenal beat Readin 5-2 though which is good. Santi Cazorla got me 3 goals and an assist for my FF team. Even better. Wish I'd made him my captain ha!
Chris just text me from his room. Telling me I must be a good brother for putting up with his shit ha. I told him I give more than my fair share, which is true. I feel for him when he does that though. He often feels guilt late at night for having said or done things. We all do. He gets angry a lot, and then if I try to tell him not to and he gets angrier... I wish he'd think about this then. He doesn't want to get angry but he gives in to it far too easily. I want him to be stronger. That's why I get on at him about things. Mum too sometimes. They can try harder. I'm always trying. Maybe too hard, but it's better than not. This brings me nicely onto the main point of this post.
http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-harsh-truths-that-will-make-you-better-person_p2/
I just read that article. Pete Milne posted it on Facebook. I don't agree with all of it, but it has a lot of great points.
"Throw enough hours of repetition at it and you can get sort of good at anything".
"People quite because it takes too long to see results, because they can't figure out that the process IS the result."
Those two quotes hit me hardest I think. They're the ones I posted as a comment in reply to it anyway. I didn't agree with everything the article said; there was a little too much focus on achievement being the be all end all - it referenced the speech from Glengarry Glen Ross a lot which has some fair points in it, but is basically a boss giving a load of employees a bollocking for lack of success, not striving to sell, and pointing out his own successes, and how expensive his watch is. Well, we all know how I feel about salesmanship! It also demeaned what we feel inside a little - yes, for the most part unless you act on your feelings they mean nothing. But then having good feelings and doing nothing with them is better than having bad ones and acting on them. There's still plenty to be said for getting by without causing harm to anyone.
But nevertheless it's right in a lot of what it says. We have life, we might as well make the most of it. Contribute to the world in some way. As I've always said 'it's not what you can do, it's what you do do'. A lost of the lyrics from my song 'The First Step' also rang out in my mind as I read it. (On P2 there's a picture of a guy struggling to get up out of bed with the caption 'Step 1: Get Up'!). I'd never really thought of it exactly as they put it all though, like we have a duty to contribute to society. All I think when I think of that is that most people are probably too scared to try and contribute in a big way. I know I have been. But why should I be? it's basically what I've been trying to tell myself for years - that what I'm doing, trying to better myself, trying to do SOMETHING, is the right thing to do. And is that really what women want to see in guys? Probably, tbh. And what do I offer? Well I immediately wrote this:
I'm intelligent, particularly good with numbers
I play drums
I play guitar
I write songs
I'm just alright at everything though really
I can touch type
I'm philosophical - I'm not just a nice guy for the sake of it, I know WHY I'm a nice guy. why it's important. I don't believe in corporate bullshit or doing things because other people tell you to do it or being nice cos it'll get me somewhere; I'm nice because I want to be, and because I know that with understanding and compromise we can make the world better and life much, much easier.
And is THAT what women want? Well why not? My problem is I struggle to get across who I really am, but that's probably cos I try too hard. No, it IS because I try to hard. In fact NO! What I get across is that I try too hard, and that's because that is who I am. But that's not what I want to be. I want to be laid back. The best part of me is laid back. I want to be confident - ditto. But I still want them to know that I'm a good person. But there we are again - wanting them to know things about me. The more you want, the more you try and the more they see you trying. Stop trying. Keep doing.
But aside from that, I'm happy with where I'm headed. Or where I've got to so far anyway. This post isn't really making much sense I don't think, or maybe it is. Maybe you'll get what I'm trying to say better than me. All I know is that article hit me. And I don't want to forget it. I want to keep striving to achieve. I can do plenty, so like I said, I should keep doing.
So, will I move back to London and become a successful singer/songwriter? Part of me really wants to. But I've been feeling again lately that I'll find it hard to leave things behind. I don't want to be missing the guys again, and my family... But I have to do what I want in life. Achieve what I can achieve. And part of me really thinks I could achieve. But focus is my problem. Will I ever commit to doing something like that? I think it's about time I did. After all I've been playing drums for years, and I love it and would like to do it in a professional capacity, but the fact is I've never liked the though of that being all I do. So I'm gonna have to try and do more. And if the worst comes to the worst and all I ever do is teach drums, at least I've still contributed.
Chris just text me from his room. Telling me I must be a good brother for putting up with his shit ha. I told him I give more than my fair share, which is true. I feel for him when he does that though. He often feels guilt late at night for having said or done things. We all do. He gets angry a lot, and then if I try to tell him not to and he gets angrier... I wish he'd think about this then. He doesn't want to get angry but he gives in to it far too easily. I want him to be stronger. That's why I get on at him about things. Mum too sometimes. They can try harder. I'm always trying. Maybe too hard, but it's better than not. This brings me nicely onto the main point of this post.
http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-harsh-truths-that-will-make-you-better-person_p2/
I just read that article. Pete Milne posted it on Facebook. I don't agree with all of it, but it has a lot of great points.
"Throw enough hours of repetition at it and you can get sort of good at anything".
"People quite because it takes too long to see results, because they can't figure out that the process IS the result."
Those two quotes hit me hardest I think. They're the ones I posted as a comment in reply to it anyway. I didn't agree with everything the article said; there was a little too much focus on achievement being the be all end all - it referenced the speech from Glengarry Glen Ross a lot which has some fair points in it, but is basically a boss giving a load of employees a bollocking for lack of success, not striving to sell, and pointing out his own successes, and how expensive his watch is. Well, we all know how I feel about salesmanship! It also demeaned what we feel inside a little - yes, for the most part unless you act on your feelings they mean nothing. But then having good feelings and doing nothing with them is better than having bad ones and acting on them. There's still plenty to be said for getting by without causing harm to anyone.
But nevertheless it's right in a lot of what it says. We have life, we might as well make the most of it. Contribute to the world in some way. As I've always said 'it's not what you can do, it's what you do do'. A lost of the lyrics from my song 'The First Step' also rang out in my mind as I read it. (On P2 there's a picture of a guy struggling to get up out of bed with the caption 'Step 1: Get Up'!). I'd never really thought of it exactly as they put it all though, like we have a duty to contribute to society. All I think when I think of that is that most people are probably too scared to try and contribute in a big way. I know I have been. But why should I be? it's basically what I've been trying to tell myself for years - that what I'm doing, trying to better myself, trying to do SOMETHING, is the right thing to do. And is that really what women want to see in guys? Probably, tbh. And what do I offer? Well I immediately wrote this:
I'm intelligent, particularly good with numbers
I play drums
I play guitar
I write songs
I'm just alright at everything though really
I can touch type
I'm philosophical - I'm not just a nice guy for the sake of it, I know WHY I'm a nice guy. why it's important. I don't believe in corporate bullshit or doing things because other people tell you to do it or being nice cos it'll get me somewhere; I'm nice because I want to be, and because I know that with understanding and compromise we can make the world better and life much, much easier.
And is THAT what women want? Well why not? My problem is I struggle to get across who I really am, but that's probably cos I try too hard. No, it IS because I try to hard. In fact NO! What I get across is that I try too hard, and that's because that is who I am. But that's not what I want to be. I want to be laid back. The best part of me is laid back. I want to be confident - ditto. But I still want them to know that I'm a good person. But there we are again - wanting them to know things about me. The more you want, the more you try and the more they see you trying. Stop trying. Keep doing.
But aside from that, I'm happy with where I'm headed. Or where I've got to so far anyway. This post isn't really making much sense I don't think, or maybe it is. Maybe you'll get what I'm trying to say better than me. All I know is that article hit me. And I don't want to forget it. I want to keep striving to achieve. I can do plenty, so like I said, I should keep doing.
So, will I move back to London and become a successful singer/songwriter? Part of me really wants to. But I've been feeling again lately that I'll find it hard to leave things behind. I don't want to be missing the guys again, and my family... But I have to do what I want in life. Achieve what I can achieve. And part of me really thinks I could achieve. But focus is my problem. Will I ever commit to doing something like that? I think it's about time I did. After all I've been playing drums for years, and I love it and would like to do it in a professional capacity, but the fact is I've never liked the though of that being all I do. So I'm gonna have to try and do more. And if the worst comes to the worst and all I ever do is teach drums, at least I've still contributed.
Sunday, 16 December 2012
16/12/2012 - 23.00
It's fair to say I've neglected this blog the last few days. It's hard keeping up with it. It shouldn't be, and wouldn't be for most, but I've got terrible long term focus and that's pretty much all that's on my mind atm. I flit from one long term focus to the next - just in the past 7 months since I've moved back I've had learning to play piano better, learning songs and busking, improving marching snare, going out and getting drunk 3 times a week (yes, I consider it a commitment - that's how I treated it), playing football regularly (twice), working on my upper body, and most recently poker, and refurbishing my snare drum. That's on top of all the things I have to do for college, the key ones being learning to play tuned percussion and sight read, which I'm not committing to well at all, and learning pieces for performance programme. And of course I can add songwriting to that first list cos it comes and goes constantly. I also had a spell of wanting to And improving my voice. Right now I want to work on them more than anything but cos I'm forcing myself to keep on with my college work I've barely been doing it at all. I've got a backed up log of ideas and half written songs that I'll probably never get round to finishing. It's probably time I sat down and decided exactly what I want and started leaving other things to rest. I decided recently that asking 'why not' is the best response to anything, but I think there's times where it's important to ask why.
I had the poker Christmas special today at the Falla household. Second year in a row I've done it. Played two games and finished somewhere in the middle in both. £30 down the shitter. Why do I play? I'm not sure. I feel like I need to be part of that community. Ryan always makes me feel like I should be, and now I'm sortof a part of it I feel like I need to commit to it fully. But I'm never really comfortable there, and I get so annoyed at myself for that. I'm never just myself. And I find that hard to take because if I were ever to be an artist I would need to know exactly who I was and be that way all the time. There's no point being a 'lad' just cos I feel it's necessary. I don't care what people think of me. I don't care if I'm a big softie and I do gay things. I HAVE TO BE WHO I AM. Until I get that sorted there's no point trying to anything.
I was gonna end things there but I've realised that this blog will have to cover the last few days which, as I'm sure you'll have noticed, includes my birthday. My 24th birthday... Ugh. I joke about no longer being a 'hot prospect for the future', but part of me really feels that way. 23 is the last age I see as being young. A student age. Now I'm 24 and I really, really ought to be going somewhere. But then I've always been behind in that respect. My formative years weren't formative enough. No one realised it but while I was quietly getting on with school work mentally I wasn't progressing at all.
But I digress. The birthday itself was alright. Good really, but with a bit of a mix of emotions. This was, of course, the pub crawl year as I'm sure you'll remember it. We hit every pub in Lanark, which I'm proud to have done, and got very drunk which was not a surprise. Had a great night really. Spewed in the Woody which was a bit gutting but hey, it happens. I don't care about that sort of shit, but no one else lets you forget it. McPhail made sure to post a picture on FB of me crashing out on the Woodpecker bar. I'm past caring though. It seems that people always look to make a joke out of me, but maybe I just imagine it. Maybe that's how everyone's treated. Obliviousness is key in getting on in this world, and it's something I don't have unfortunately - once again held back by what intelligence I have. Maybe if I stop thinking so much and keep doing I'll stop caring what people are saying about as much. Who knows.
I had the poker Christmas special today at the Falla household. Second year in a row I've done it. Played two games and finished somewhere in the middle in both. £30 down the shitter. Why do I play? I'm not sure. I feel like I need to be part of that community. Ryan always makes me feel like I should be, and now I'm sortof a part of it I feel like I need to commit to it fully. But I'm never really comfortable there, and I get so annoyed at myself for that. I'm never just myself. And I find that hard to take because if I were ever to be an artist I would need to know exactly who I was and be that way all the time. There's no point being a 'lad' just cos I feel it's necessary. I don't care what people think of me. I don't care if I'm a big softie and I do gay things. I HAVE TO BE WHO I AM. Until I get that sorted there's no point trying to anything.
I was gonna end things there but I've realised that this blog will have to cover the last few days which, as I'm sure you'll have noticed, includes my birthday. My 24th birthday... Ugh. I joke about no longer being a 'hot prospect for the future', but part of me really feels that way. 23 is the last age I see as being young. A student age. Now I'm 24 and I really, really ought to be going somewhere. But then I've always been behind in that respect. My formative years weren't formative enough. No one realised it but while I was quietly getting on with school work mentally I wasn't progressing at all.
But I digress. The birthday itself was alright. Good really, but with a bit of a mix of emotions. This was, of course, the pub crawl year as I'm sure you'll remember it. We hit every pub in Lanark, which I'm proud to have done, and got very drunk which was not a surprise. Had a great night really. Spewed in the Woody which was a bit gutting but hey, it happens. I don't care about that sort of shit, but no one else lets you forget it. McPhail made sure to post a picture on FB of me crashing out on the Woodpecker bar. I'm past caring though. It seems that people always look to make a joke out of me, but maybe I just imagine it. Maybe that's how everyone's treated. Obliviousness is key in getting on in this world, and it's something I don't have unfortunately - once again held back by what intelligence I have. Maybe if I stop thinking so much and keep doing I'll stop caring what people are saying about as much. Who knows.
Sunday, 9 December 2012
9/12/12 - about 5.30
It's Sunday. West Ham are currently beating Liverpool 2-1 at Upton Park and I'm egging on Kevin Nolan to score so I can get some FF points. Season started well but is slowly going downhill. Fellaini and Michu are the main culprits. I kept not subbing them in adamant they'd stop scoring. They haven't ha. I did finally sub Michu in this week though and he scored twice - now top scorer this season with 12. And he cost Swansea 2mil. Unbelievable.
Anyway my reason for posting is to talk about the weekend past. I got asked last Tues by Dale to play in a Stars In Their Eyes show in Douglas. It went really well in the end, I love being part of the house band. Being in the band pit is a great feeling, it's something I'd like to do more of in the future. It was a charity event so I was happy to do it for nothing but they gave £40 in the end which was great. It was a good experience. We only had one rehearsal on the Thursday and we pulled it together quite quickly and I'm generally happy with how I did. Did my job with no real fuss and they were happy with me. Met some cool people as well, jammed with a guitar and Dale on keys backstage which was cool. Was good to catch up with Dale as well, he's a good guy, and loves getting involved in these things. I can see he's gonna become a pillar of the community in a place like Douglas - he was involved in a Panto right before this show, then was doing another kids show after. He's a great keys player as well, and although I'd heard at school he wasn't great a reading music he seemed to be doing a fine job during the show.
Aside from that there's not much to say. Gonna do the pub quiz tonight for the first time in a while. Didn't get asked to play football today which sucks - I'm getting badly out of shape. Also sent out the invite for my birthday which is on Friday - gonna go to inn on the loch for food then a massive pub crawl. Gonna be epic. Aiming to hit EVERY pub in town so we'll see how that goes. Ally (Stewart) was giving Ryan and Scorge a lot of smack talk last night about how he's gonna out-drink them. Thankfully for him Scorge can't make it til later but not doubt Ske will take up the challenge! I'm just looking forward to a good night.
Anyway, dinner's ready (Sunday roast!) so I'm aff. Catch ye. (Y)
Anyway my reason for posting is to talk about the weekend past. I got asked last Tues by Dale to play in a Stars In Their Eyes show in Douglas. It went really well in the end, I love being part of the house band. Being in the band pit is a great feeling, it's something I'd like to do more of in the future. It was a charity event so I was happy to do it for nothing but they gave £40 in the end which was great. It was a good experience. We only had one rehearsal on the Thursday and we pulled it together quite quickly and I'm generally happy with how I did. Did my job with no real fuss and they were happy with me. Met some cool people as well, jammed with a guitar and Dale on keys backstage which was cool. Was good to catch up with Dale as well, he's a good guy, and loves getting involved in these things. I can see he's gonna become a pillar of the community in a place like Douglas - he was involved in a Panto right before this show, then was doing another kids show after. He's a great keys player as well, and although I'd heard at school he wasn't great a reading music he seemed to be doing a fine job during the show.
Aside from that there's not much to say. Gonna do the pub quiz tonight for the first time in a while. Didn't get asked to play football today which sucks - I'm getting badly out of shape. Also sent out the invite for my birthday which is on Friday - gonna go to inn on the loch for food then a massive pub crawl. Gonna be epic. Aiming to hit EVERY pub in town so we'll see how that goes. Ally (Stewart) was giving Ryan and Scorge a lot of smack talk last night about how he's gonna out-drink them. Thankfully for him Scorge can't make it til later but not doubt Ske will take up the challenge! I'm just looking forward to a good night.
Anyway, dinner's ready (Sunday roast!) so I'm aff. Catch ye. (Y)
Tuesday, 4 December 2012
5-12-12 - 1.30am
I think this may actually be my first late night/early morning post thus far, which is strange given my penchant for late nights. You'll know all about that. I doubt very much that you've changed in that respect! Night time's just better isn't it?
I'm able to touch type now. This is a source of comfort to me. It seems to take me a while but once I embark on learning a skill I do eventually master it. The next stop for me is to become a better singer, and performer, and songwriter I guess although I already like a lot of what I write. I'm currently in the middle of writing '24 Hour Drive Thru' which I think has the potential to be a damn good bursting-with-energy kind of song. You'll know better of course, but if it doesn't come to anything I think you should revisit it - it definitely has potential.
This brings me to my point of the moment - once again my ability to take on a bit too much. It's not all my fault this time really though. College work is mounting up and although I'm halfway through my history essay I'm also gonna have a piece to write soon for ethics, a case study for law, and I've got to start my lessons soon for teaching as well as my presentation for the same class (the workload for which just takes the piss). This of course is on top of my performance programme, which I played a couple of songs from for Rich today and have been asked to do work on before next week, and my project which isn't getting the time it needs as it is. Then on top of ALL THAT, I got a message from Dale today asking me to play in a Star in their Eyes type thing in Douglas. Of course I said yes, cos it'll be good fun - it's all Christmas songs and stuff and I've just went through them all and they shouldn't pose too much of a problem (although the hits in 'Baby It's Cold Outside' are a bit annoying). But that means I'll be rehearsing on Thurs night (no poker this week...) and playing the show Fri and Sat nights (night out after? We'll see). It's probably a commitment too many really, but I fancy doing something fun like that, I haven't played drums in public in literally months (since Milk Bar times) and you never know, it could lead to something.
So basically I'm rambling about not having much time, thus of course using up even more time. Classic Dave. I should probably get some sleep. Busy day tomorrow (on top of ALL THAT!!). Going to do some Christmas shopping before drum corps, then ethics, then gonna go see a film myself like a proper loner. Silver Linings Playbook does look good, and with Jennifer Lawrence and Chris Tucker in it I can't really go wrong! (I made the point to Chris earlier that the two biggest actors in it are Bradley Cooper and Robert Di Nero yet I'm going to see it for the others ha! I do love Bradley though. And Di Nero.) So it should be a good day but of course leaves me not getting much done again. I'll have to do some practice on Thurs before rehearsal in Douglas, both on my programme and project work, and try and get first lesson plans done for teaching by next week. Really can't be bothered with teaching much... Have a feeling I'll end up fabricating stuff for it, but I'll try not to.
Toodles.
Monday, 3 December 2012
3/12/12 - about 12.15
So I haven't posted in about a week, which means I'm gonna have to try and remember all that's gone on over the past week that's been of note. First I'll focus on the present - it snowed last night and used the snowfall as an excuse not to go to college. Bad Dave. Yes, I really should have gone, but then I only had one class - teaching class - and it would have meant driving in and back so I've at least saved some time and money on that. The other reason for going would have been to continue this essay on minimalism so now I'm tasked with trying to get as much done at home as I would have then - probably not gonna happen. Thankfully Chris has taken Josh out for a run, so I'm not having to work through his whining, poor lad. I do love that dog but I gotta crack on with work. After this post that is.
I had an interesting experience last night, not unlike the one you'll be having now. I went on my Twitter account which I haven't used in years (everyone seems to be getting in to it now) and was surprised to find I'd apparently made 141 tweets in my time. I didn't believe this cos I don't remember ever having really used Twitter, but it turns out I did, I think sometime between Bebo and Facebook. The posts were awful though. Most of them were aimed at (@) Claire (boo) and it was a total cringe. I hope you aren't thinking the same now! Probably are tbh. Ah well. I still like to think I've grown since then. Back then everything I wrote I wrote for other people, for image or whatever. Now what I write I write for me. Like this blog. Even if you're the only person that does ever read it that's good enough for me. That's how it should be really. It's for me and no one else.
So right now I'm listening to 'U Smile' by Justin Bieber. Apparently someone took the track and slowed it right down and pointed out the minimalist elements to it - that'll be going in the essay ha.
Other than that I got right into this series of I'm A Celebrity; it finished on Sat there. Charlie Brooks won but I thought Ashley from Pussy Cat Dolls deserved it a bit more. I know, I watch a load of shite. You probably do too!
Sat night was quite a big one for me in some ways. It was just a typical night out really, chatted to Dan in Spoons (he filled me in on all the scandal surrounding Laura Mooney and Johnny Cab ha), met the guys in Maisies then went to the Woody. Turns out there's such thing as 'December Licensing' which allows all pubs to be open til 1 - that was news to me. Course it meant the guys ditched me in the Woody to go back to Maisies - Ryan went cos he winched the barmaid last week and Marc followed suit cos that's what he does. I stayed and chatted to Kim and Rachel then Gav and Paul for a bit. It was a good night.
Anyway somewhere in between I came to a realisation. The sort I always knew deep down but hadn't really felt. All the things I want here - to spend time with my family and friends, to teach locally, to start a function band or whatever - these are all things I can do anytime. I could come back when I'm 30 and still do these things. But if I really want to make it as a singer-songwriter - and I do, as much as I find it hard to admit to others - then the time to act is now. Once I'm done with this degree I'm thinking I'm gonna go back to London. Most of what I want right now is there. Ryan said he's come with me but I doubt that'll happen. He's miss it too much here. But we'll see. I need to stop being afraid to admit what I want from the world. It's not gonna make a difference if I tell people I'm a singer-songwriter. If I write songs and sing them that's what I am. And that's what I want to be too. I mean, I'm different to a lot of singer-songwriters. I'm into a lot of different music, and being a drummer I've studied a lot of things irrelevant to that side of things but maybe that's a good thing. It could help give me identity, and that's important. Who knows what form my music will have taken if I spent a few years just playing? It may start out with just me on guitar but it could go anywhere from there in a place like London. One thing's for sure, it's about me from here. If I join a band playing someone else's music that's gonna play second fiddle and they're gonna know it. Cos Void Pleasantries, Coney, The Milk Bar - when I look at it none of them were doing anything I can't do myself. And yeah, my drumming helped them along cos I'm good at what I do, but musically I'm gonna do what I want to do.
Anyway I'm getting back to work. Other things to remember? Ally came round yesterday and we had another Take Me Out day ha. Always a laugh. Apparently he's broken up with Gillian though which is gutting. I like Gillian a lot but oh well. If it's meant to be it's meant to be. And I have a feeling it is but I could be wrong. You'll know won't you? Ha.
I had an interesting experience last night, not unlike the one you'll be having now. I went on my Twitter account which I haven't used in years (everyone seems to be getting in to it now) and was surprised to find I'd apparently made 141 tweets in my time. I didn't believe this cos I don't remember ever having really used Twitter, but it turns out I did, I think sometime between Bebo and Facebook. The posts were awful though. Most of them were aimed at (@) Claire (boo) and it was a total cringe. I hope you aren't thinking the same now! Probably are tbh. Ah well. I still like to think I've grown since then. Back then everything I wrote I wrote for other people, for image or whatever. Now what I write I write for me. Like this blog. Even if you're the only person that does ever read it that's good enough for me. That's how it should be really. It's for me and no one else.
So right now I'm listening to 'U Smile' by Justin Bieber. Apparently someone took the track and slowed it right down and pointed out the minimalist elements to it - that'll be going in the essay ha.
Other than that I got right into this series of I'm A Celebrity; it finished on Sat there. Charlie Brooks won but I thought Ashley from Pussy Cat Dolls deserved it a bit more. I know, I watch a load of shite. You probably do too!
Sat night was quite a big one for me in some ways. It was just a typical night out really, chatted to Dan in Spoons (he filled me in on all the scandal surrounding Laura Mooney and Johnny Cab ha), met the guys in Maisies then went to the Woody. Turns out there's such thing as 'December Licensing' which allows all pubs to be open til 1 - that was news to me. Course it meant the guys ditched me in the Woody to go back to Maisies - Ryan went cos he winched the barmaid last week and Marc followed suit cos that's what he does. I stayed and chatted to Kim and Rachel then Gav and Paul for a bit. It was a good night.
Anyway somewhere in between I came to a realisation. The sort I always knew deep down but hadn't really felt. All the things I want here - to spend time with my family and friends, to teach locally, to start a function band or whatever - these are all things I can do anytime. I could come back when I'm 30 and still do these things. But if I really want to make it as a singer-songwriter - and I do, as much as I find it hard to admit to others - then the time to act is now. Once I'm done with this degree I'm thinking I'm gonna go back to London. Most of what I want right now is there. Ryan said he's come with me but I doubt that'll happen. He's miss it too much here. But we'll see. I need to stop being afraid to admit what I want from the world. It's not gonna make a difference if I tell people I'm a singer-songwriter. If I write songs and sing them that's what I am. And that's what I want to be too. I mean, I'm different to a lot of singer-songwriters. I'm into a lot of different music, and being a drummer I've studied a lot of things irrelevant to that side of things but maybe that's a good thing. It could help give me identity, and that's important. Who knows what form my music will have taken if I spent a few years just playing? It may start out with just me on guitar but it could go anywhere from there in a place like London. One thing's for sure, it's about me from here. If I join a band playing someone else's music that's gonna play second fiddle and they're gonna know it. Cos Void Pleasantries, Coney, The Milk Bar - when I look at it none of them were doing anything I can't do myself. And yeah, my drumming helped them along cos I'm good at what I do, but musically I'm gonna do what I want to do.
Anyway I'm getting back to work. Other things to remember? Ally came round yesterday and we had another Take Me Out day ha. Always a laugh. Apparently he's broken up with Gillian though which is gutting. I like Gillian a lot but oh well. If it's meant to be it's meant to be. And I have a feeling it is but I could be wrong. You'll know won't you? Ha.
Tuesday, 27 November 2012
27/11/12 - 11.30ish
So I'm in the library at college. Walking up the stairs there I had a classic 'Dave plays out an interview scene in his head' scenario, with Jonathan Ross or someone, except they have an actual interest in my life. This time I was talking about the struggles of being a degree student. I just had a lesson with Rich and we're going in depth looking at metric modulation, time and feel possibilities etc. It's heavy stuff, and he's talking to me about how I'm a degree student, I need to be thinking about what kind of musician I want to be and explore the possibilities there are... All I want to do is play pop music. That's where my head is.
I've started writing songs again lately, and I'm enjoying it. If I had the time I'd like to go out and perform them. I know my voice is gradually getting better and it will continue to do so and being a performer is a possibility for me if I put a lot of effort into it. That's what I want. I don't feel like I could say that in my drum lessons though and that bugs me. I want to feel like I can be who I am all the time, even if it means telling my drum teacher I'd rather sing 'Beneath Your Beautiful' by Labrinth and Emeli Sande (was learning to play it on piano last night) than study metric modulation. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy studying complex drum concepts, and I like to think I will get to use them one day, or at least my general drumming skills anyway, but I don't see myself as just a drummer. I'm too interested in music generally, and the performance side of things. How have these things worked out for you? Did you figure out what you want to do? I hope so. Saying that, I know if you're reading this and you've not you'll be feeling like crap so I'm sorry too if that's the case! I'm sure there's still time though. There's always time. :)
Well, I'd better get looking up some of this stuff Rich asked me to look at. Then it's back to writing about minimalism... At least once it's done it's out the way! Fun times.
Btw, other things happening right now: Joey Barton's French accent - lolzer! At football a couple of days back we had an amazing start to the game - scored 4 in the first 10 minutes then it kinda went downhill. Got a bit ill so it wasn't entirely my fault. Thinking we'll play poker again this Thurs. Quite enjoyed it last week tbh. Oh, and we had Teri's 21st on sat there. Really enjoyed it actually. Was gutted at the time I missed out on parties but Dan brought me home which was just as well I think. Ske went off to some other party and met some lassie who he winched. I wonder who? Ha.
I've started writing songs again lately, and I'm enjoying it. If I had the time I'd like to go out and perform them. I know my voice is gradually getting better and it will continue to do so and being a performer is a possibility for me if I put a lot of effort into it. That's what I want. I don't feel like I could say that in my drum lessons though and that bugs me. I want to feel like I can be who I am all the time, even if it means telling my drum teacher I'd rather sing 'Beneath Your Beautiful' by Labrinth and Emeli Sande (was learning to play it on piano last night) than study metric modulation. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy studying complex drum concepts, and I like to think I will get to use them one day, or at least my general drumming skills anyway, but I don't see myself as just a drummer. I'm too interested in music generally, and the performance side of things. How have these things worked out for you? Did you figure out what you want to do? I hope so. Saying that, I know if you're reading this and you've not you'll be feeling like crap so I'm sorry too if that's the case! I'm sure there's still time though. There's always time. :)
Well, I'd better get looking up some of this stuff Rich asked me to look at. Then it's back to writing about minimalism... At least once it's done it's out the way! Fun times.
Btw, other things happening right now: Joey Barton's French accent - lolzer! At football a couple of days back we had an amazing start to the game - scored 4 in the first 10 minutes then it kinda went downhill. Got a bit ill so it wasn't entirely my fault. Thinking we'll play poker again this Thurs. Quite enjoyed it last week tbh. Oh, and we had Teri's 21st on sat there. Really enjoyed it actually. Was gutted at the time I missed out on parties but Dan brought me home which was just as well I think. Ske went off to some other party and met some lassie who he winched. I wonder who? Ha.
Friday, 23 November 2012
24/11/12 - 2.02
I meant to go into more detail earlier on how much I love Ed Sheeran. I mean, you'll know how much of an influence he was, and probably still is, on you, but right now I just can't get enough of him and everything he's done. It's both beautiful and frustrating at the same time. I want his life. I want to be a successful singer/songwriter, to have written songs over the years that I've recorded and been out and played gigs all over the place. He's done all that and he's only 21. I'm nearly 24 and I'm still a mess.
At the same time though he makes me believe I could do it all in some way. But right now I've never felt further from it. Listening to his music makes me miss London like mad. When I was there I felt like I was going somewhere, even though I wasn't really. But maybe I could've. Who knows.
I keep getting on at myself for not marrying up the different sides of me, like why am I learning to play drums, getting in depth in the instrument, if I want to be a songwriter? But maybe there's nothing wrong with that. It's all part of who I am, and I shouldn't be trying to deny that. Embrace it. I talked with Mum and Chris tonight about a lot of this and they've made me feel a bit better about it all. At least they've helped me realise again that there's no point thinking too much about it. If it's gonna be it's gonna be. Maybe I'm not ever gonna be famous. There's nothing wrong with getting into teaching and doing that well. And there's plenty other stuff I could do round here - start a function band maybe, that sort of thing. And there's nothing stopping me continuing to write and going out and gigging round here, maybe through in Glasgow. It could lead somewhere, who knows? Even if I just became known round here that would be something. A start maybe. A good start I think. Get the courage to be a local singer/songwriter and you can go from there. Let's do it.
At the same time though he makes me believe I could do it all in some way. But right now I've never felt further from it. Listening to his music makes me miss London like mad. When I was there I felt like I was going somewhere, even though I wasn't really. But maybe I could've. Who knows.
I keep getting on at myself for not marrying up the different sides of me, like why am I learning to play drums, getting in depth in the instrument, if I want to be a songwriter? But maybe there's nothing wrong with that. It's all part of who I am, and I shouldn't be trying to deny that. Embrace it. I talked with Mum and Chris tonight about a lot of this and they've made me feel a bit better about it all. At least they've helped me realise again that there's no point thinking too much about it. If it's gonna be it's gonna be. Maybe I'm not ever gonna be famous. There's nothing wrong with getting into teaching and doing that well. And there's plenty other stuff I could do round here - start a function band maybe, that sort of thing. And there's nothing stopping me continuing to write and going out and gigging round here, maybe through in Glasgow. It could lead somewhere, who knows? Even if I just became known round here that would be something. A start maybe. A good start I think. Get the courage to be a local singer/songwriter and you can go from there. Let's do it.
23/11/12 - 12.16
Currently lying in a bed after another morning of sleeping in followed by not wanting to get up out of bed. Standard, as Rupert would have said ha. I miss Rupert. I miss London in general. Just one of many things I've got going on in my head right now. I still question my decision to move back. All I've done is invite back in a load of old feelings and habits really. I wanted to come back to see if I'd changed if I put myself back in that setting, see if anything had changed. I guess much hasn't. I've changed but now being here just makes me more unsure than ever. Like, what do I want to do with my life? I've just been watching more videos of Ed (one of his songs has been used by One Direction on their new album and went to number 1 and I love it) and it makes me want to be a songwriter more than anything. But then college right now is all about drums, a project on learning to play tuned percussion and sight read music that I'm really not doing much work for right now (I'm going to after this, and lunch) and academic stuff like 20th Century history (boo), and Law and Ethics which I actually really enjoy. But with so much going on and buzzing round my head it just doesn't help me at all.
I played poker at Biggar last night cos Ryan's been going on about it for a while so I thought I should. I mean, I quite enjoyed the night - finished 9th out of 16 which is at least better than Ske did his first couple of times! - but where does that leave me? The guys there, the people there, they're different to me. They lead a different life, different things are important to them. But then I could fit in there if I really wanted, but it would mean letting go of the other side of me. I don't know how to invite every side of me, the full me, to be part of every situation I'm in. How do I do that? I mean if I'm at college they wouldn't understand me being obsessed with a football management computer game (I've just started a new game with Rangers on 01/02 for about the millionth time. I've named it 'The EBT Specialists ha). Just like the guys here don't understand that if I want to be a musician really that ought to come first and all the things we do, the going and drinking, the pub quizzes, the bowling nights, the poker etc, all that needs to go out the window. I want to be a musician and that's final. But whether I'll ever do more than teach, who knows. Rich, my drum teacher, made a comment the other day about being proud to not just go through the motions, to be part of the system. He wants to be a good musician and teach others to be good musicians, not just teach them technicalities. But I'm not even sure exactly what his opinion of a good musician is. Everyone plays music differently and yeah, he's probably well learned at playing lots of different styles, which is something I struggle with cos I'm son rock/pop orientated, but the more you learn about music in a broad sense the less creative you might be. The greatest musicians don't think about their style, they play things how it makes sense to them. From Hendrix to Bowie to Ed Sheeran, that's just how they understand music. I guess this sums up my life really - am I the sort of man who plays it however he wants, or who learns to play the way everyone else does? Is there room for both? I hope you've figured a lot of this stuff out cos I sure haven't!
Anyway I'm thinking I'm gonna write a song about this town, and what it makes me into. I wonder if it turns out any good. Guess you'll know!
Also I meant to say a while ago that I thought of another cool thing about this blog - should I ever meet anyone special, or should there be anyone who wants to learn about what I've been like over the years, this will the place for them to come. 23 (nearly 24!) year old Dave and his thoughts, all preserved. Like Riddle's diary, 'cept I can't control anyone from here. I don't think.
Last thing - who cares what anyone says or acts or makes me feel. I want to be myself all the time! That's the real issue here isn't it? It doesn't matter what I do, I should be able to feel like it's okay to feel it - and to show that! Can I be the real Davey Stu? I hope so. I hope you are. You better be! That's why I'm writing this - I'm counting on it!
I played poker at Biggar last night cos Ryan's been going on about it for a while so I thought I should. I mean, I quite enjoyed the night - finished 9th out of 16 which is at least better than Ske did his first couple of times! - but where does that leave me? The guys there, the people there, they're different to me. They lead a different life, different things are important to them. But then I could fit in there if I really wanted, but it would mean letting go of the other side of me. I don't know how to invite every side of me, the full me, to be part of every situation I'm in. How do I do that? I mean if I'm at college they wouldn't understand me being obsessed with a football management computer game (I've just started a new game with Rangers on 01/02 for about the millionth time. I've named it 'The EBT Specialists ha). Just like the guys here don't understand that if I want to be a musician really that ought to come first and all the things we do, the going and drinking, the pub quizzes, the bowling nights, the poker etc, all that needs to go out the window. I want to be a musician and that's final. But whether I'll ever do more than teach, who knows. Rich, my drum teacher, made a comment the other day about being proud to not just go through the motions, to be part of the system. He wants to be a good musician and teach others to be good musicians, not just teach them technicalities. But I'm not even sure exactly what his opinion of a good musician is. Everyone plays music differently and yeah, he's probably well learned at playing lots of different styles, which is something I struggle with cos I'm son rock/pop orientated, but the more you learn about music in a broad sense the less creative you might be. The greatest musicians don't think about their style, they play things how it makes sense to them. From Hendrix to Bowie to Ed Sheeran, that's just how they understand music. I guess this sums up my life really - am I the sort of man who plays it however he wants, or who learns to play the way everyone else does? Is there room for both? I hope you've figured a lot of this stuff out cos I sure haven't!
Anyway I'm thinking I'm gonna write a song about this town, and what it makes me into. I wonder if it turns out any good. Guess you'll know!
Also I meant to say a while ago that I thought of another cool thing about this blog - should I ever meet anyone special, or should there be anyone who wants to learn about what I've been like over the years, this will the place for them to come. 23 (nearly 24!) year old Dave and his thoughts, all preserved. Like Riddle's diary, 'cept I can't control anyone from here. I don't think.
Last thing - who cares what anyone says or acts or makes me feel. I want to be myself all the time! That's the real issue here isn't it? It doesn't matter what I do, I should be able to feel like it's okay to feel it - and to show that! Can I be the real Davey Stu? I hope so. I hope you are. You better be! That's why I'm writing this - I'm counting on it!
Monday, 19 November 2012
19/11/12 - 10.50
So I haven't posted in a few days - as usual weekends are busier than other times. We went to see Feeder on Sat with the bros - was awesome. We got a bit tanked up on the train with a crate of magners which makes it all a bit blurrier than it should be! Then I met up with the guys in Wishaw for Ally Basho's birthday - again, was drunker than I would have liked, whole thing's a bit blurry. Was a fairly average night there though, not much craziness happening. I'm starting to think night's out ain't really worth it. I pay for them in time and money and hangovers and I don't get much out of them. Honestly I'm thinking of giving them up but it'll mean distancing myself from the guys cos that' pretty much all they do. I wonder how close you still are with them? Do you still go out much? I think life could more substantial without nights out. Maybe you'll know better. I've Terri's birthday party weekend coming so I'll have to be out for that but I don't plan on going mental. Would probably be best if I didn't!
So what else is happening? Right now I'm in the college library. Forced myself to wake up early for nothing (I don't doubt you'll still find waking up difficult - it's the bane of my life!). I put down in my notes I had a meeting with Scott our music teaching teacher today when it's not til next week. Eedjit. I've resolved to spend the time firstly doing this blog then getting on with research for 20th Century History essay on Minimalism. 3500 words. The joy. I'm really hoping to just blitz it and get it out the way and never think about it again. Til I'm you and I'm reading this post haha. Do you even remember doing it?
Other than that I saw a funny number plate on the way in. I took a picture of it but I'll probably never upload it. Too lazy haha. It was X583 MEN. Yaaaass. There's another one in West Calder I keep trying to get a shot of. It has the letters YWC on it. Remember what that stands for? If you don't ask Ske haha! Maybe if I collect enough of them I will upload them. We can make it a thing haha.
I can't think of much more to say so this is probably a good place to stop. If I give it long enough I'm sure I'll think of something else. Oh wait, I have. I've recently revived my Queen's Park game on champ man. That game! We bought Dan a book on it for his christmas and it's been playing on my mind as a result. Typical!
So what else is happening? Right now I'm in the college library. Forced myself to wake up early for nothing (I don't doubt you'll still find waking up difficult - it's the bane of my life!). I put down in my notes I had a meeting with Scott our music teaching teacher today when it's not til next week. Eedjit. I've resolved to spend the time firstly doing this blog then getting on with research for 20th Century History essay on Minimalism. 3500 words. The joy. I'm really hoping to just blitz it and get it out the way and never think about it again. Til I'm you and I'm reading this post haha. Do you even remember doing it?
Other than that I saw a funny number plate on the way in. I took a picture of it but I'll probably never upload it. Too lazy haha. It was X583 MEN. Yaaaass. There's another one in West Calder I keep trying to get a shot of. It has the letters YWC on it. Remember what that stands for? If you don't ask Ske haha! Maybe if I collect enough of them I will upload them. We can make it a thing haha.
I can't think of much more to say so this is probably a good place to stop. If I give it long enough I'm sure I'll think of something else. Oh wait, I have. I've recently revived my Queen's Park game on champ man. That game! We bought Dan a book on it for his christmas and it's been playing on my mind as a result. Typical!
Thursday, 15 November 2012
15/11/12 - 20.45
This is gonna be a short one - I've had one of those days where I failed to get up before 11, in spite of the fact Dan called and woke me at 10. I then argued with dad that I ought to have different a different bed - I'm still staying in the double bed that is genuinely the most comfortable bed I've ever slept in - cos it would help me get up easier if I weren't so comfortable. To be fair, I think it's true, and past evidence would suggest so. Saying that I still think the temperature is the main problem. This country is just too cold. I hope wherever you are it's warmer - and you've gotten better at getting up in the mornings! The problem isn't even so much the lost time. I sleep so deeply that when I wake up all my drive is gone, and I don't care about a damn things, hence why I just go back to sleep. Night time's always better. At night I want things. In the morning I don't care. Dad and Dan both just told me I ought to just try harder to get up, force myself to do it. Maybe they're right. Maybe you'll know better.
I strangely find it quite comforting writing to you. I have this notion cos you're in the future that you're gonna be wiser, and more knowledgeable than me. You probably aren't. We've always had this habit of treating our past selves like they were silly and naive but are we really much smarter? Probably not. Saying that you're probably reading this thinking you are. Maybe you are a bit. I hope you are a bit! But probably not as much as you think.
Right I am gonna go. I need to practise Glockenspiel ha. You have to better at that than me! I've wasted pretty much the whole day. That's what happens when we oversleep. Mum and Chris are currently watching Elementary - the American version of Sherlock. Before that there was a bit of Cheers, Big Bang Theory, HIMYM. And of course I've let all of them distract me. In fairness Big Bang Theory is brilliant - right now it's your favourite show. I wonder if it's finished yet for you? It's currently on season 6. I hope it doesn't ever finish.
I was about to write the word 'ciao' as a sign off, just cos I always felt like it, but then I remembered a comment Linzi made on FB earlier (does it still rule the cyber world in your time?). Apparently a comment I made was gay. Sigh. People never will get that I can say anything. I can be anything, good or bad. That's actually what makes me special. Or the only thing that might.
I strangely find it quite comforting writing to you. I have this notion cos you're in the future that you're gonna be wiser, and more knowledgeable than me. You probably aren't. We've always had this habit of treating our past selves like they were silly and naive but are we really much smarter? Probably not. Saying that you're probably reading this thinking you are. Maybe you are a bit. I hope you are a bit! But probably not as much as you think.
Right I am gonna go. I need to practise Glockenspiel ha. You have to better at that than me! I've wasted pretty much the whole day. That's what happens when we oversleep. Mum and Chris are currently watching Elementary - the American version of Sherlock. Before that there was a bit of Cheers, Big Bang Theory, HIMYM. And of course I've let all of them distract me. In fairness Big Bang Theory is brilliant - right now it's your favourite show. I wonder if it's finished yet for you? It's currently on season 6. I hope it doesn't ever finish.
I was about to write the word 'ciao' as a sign off, just cos I always felt like it, but then I remembered a comment Linzi made on FB earlier (does it still rule the cyber world in your time?). Apparently a comment I made was gay. Sigh. People never will get that I can say anything. I can be anything, good or bad. That's actually what makes me special. Or the only thing that might.
Tuesday, 13 November 2012
13/11/12, about 11.30
It's not even been 12 hours since my last post and I'm back, currently sitting in the library of Stevenson/Edinburgh College. It's probably a bit sad that I'm choosing to post again already, but I've been thinking a lot about this blog and I'm feeling that it could really mean something. Like, something important. I have like a running commentary or narrative constantly going in my head (let's face it we always have!) and there's no way to silence it so I might as well see if I can make something of it. It could be that this blog is what eventually defines me. I guess you'll know better, wherever/whenever you are!
It's also occurred to me that I haven't explained the actual purpose of this blog. I guess I didn't feel I'd need to given you're the only one I'm writing to and hopefully you're memory isn't so bad that you've actually forgotten why you even started it! But should an outsider stumble upon this I feel they should at least understand. Basically, I have an atrocious long term memory. My short term memory's fine - great, in fact. I memorise numbers and facts over a short time like no one I know. But over months and years I forget facts and events like they never even happened, or often they get blurred or changed over time, and this upsets me. I think it's generally down to the fact I'm always living half in the present and half in the future, which isn't altogether a bad thing. It's good to keep moving forward. But I don't want to forget everything. These days are important in my life as the next ones will be and it's important I remember them.
So I've started a blog. It's really just a diary I guess, given all I'm documenting is my current thoughts and feelings and goings on in my life, but posting it as a blog means that as long as the internet doesn't crash or fail in some big way, or this site doesn't disappear, which I guess is more likely now I think about it, then it will always be here. ALWAYS. That's the kicker. I like that. I'm immortalising my words! I'm cheating death! And that's just the sort of delusion of grandeur I get off on. But seriously, whatever I say here will always be somewhere, I hope, for people to read so it gives my life some purpose and that's always a good thing.
So back today. I've just had a lesson with Rich, my (our) drum teacher. Talking about superimposing 4/4 rhythms into 6/8 and 12/8 time and the like. It was a pretty cool lesson and I get it mostly. It'll help to work on it anyway, although it's not entirely what I'm about as drummer. But there's nothing wrong with drawing influence and ideas from different places. Rich has a habit of putting across what he teaches as though it's the most important aspect of the instrument, which is fair enough I guess - I kind of do the same - but it's not all I'm about as a drummer and I think it's just his perspective. It's one way of looking at things for sure - considering the mathematics behind the beats and using that as a way of analysing feel etc. Generally I prefer just to feel. But when I think of it putting the two together has to be the best way. Feel what you want to play but understand it as well. There's nowt wrong with that.
Right, I've just decided I'm gonna start posting random facts about the days. I can't discuss my feelings on everything but if I at least document the facts of what I'm doing it'll give you a chance to say 'oh yeah, I mind doing that!'. So here we go:
- Mum, Dad and Dan went Christmas shopping today. That's not terribly relevant but you followed them to Livi on your way to college which was funny. Although we were following a lorry which was not. Dad practically skipped a red light at West Calder cos it was so slow going through it haha. Oops, there I go again. Feelings.
- I've got a lesson tonight with one of our students, Conner. Cool.
- I've got law class at 2. Tuesdays at 2. Cool.
- I'm meeting a bass player who contacted me about being a part of my band for solo performance. He says he's quite into playing prog and is cool with the set I've got so far (Sound of Muzak, Subdivisions, Golden Rule, Universal Mind, Schism) so that's cool too.
I think that's all I need to say for now. Oh also, level (incidentally Levels by Avicii came out just a few months back and is probably your favourite song of the year. I've also loved 'Call Me Maybe' by Carly Rae Jepsen (yeah, I'm a big gay but you probably still are too). It's gotten a bit old now but already gives me waves of nostalgia for the summer just gone), Hannah (again, one that everyone knows, just forgot it before) and, well there's loads of 4 letter ones which I won't bother mentioning after this one. Boob. Heehee.
It's also occurred to me that I haven't explained the actual purpose of this blog. I guess I didn't feel I'd need to given you're the only one I'm writing to and hopefully you're memory isn't so bad that you've actually forgotten why you even started it! But should an outsider stumble upon this I feel they should at least understand. Basically, I have an atrocious long term memory. My short term memory's fine - great, in fact. I memorise numbers and facts over a short time like no one I know. But over months and years I forget facts and events like they never even happened, or often they get blurred or changed over time, and this upsets me. I think it's generally down to the fact I'm always living half in the present and half in the future, which isn't altogether a bad thing. It's good to keep moving forward. But I don't want to forget everything. These days are important in my life as the next ones will be and it's important I remember them.
So I've started a blog. It's really just a diary I guess, given all I'm documenting is my current thoughts and feelings and goings on in my life, but posting it as a blog means that as long as the internet doesn't crash or fail in some big way, or this site doesn't disappear, which I guess is more likely now I think about it, then it will always be here. ALWAYS. That's the kicker. I like that. I'm immortalising my words! I'm cheating death! And that's just the sort of delusion of grandeur I get off on. But seriously, whatever I say here will always be somewhere, I hope, for people to read so it gives my life some purpose and that's always a good thing.
So back today. I've just had a lesson with Rich, my (our) drum teacher. Talking about superimposing 4/4 rhythms into 6/8 and 12/8 time and the like. It was a pretty cool lesson and I get it mostly. It'll help to work on it anyway, although it's not entirely what I'm about as drummer. But there's nothing wrong with drawing influence and ideas from different places. Rich has a habit of putting across what he teaches as though it's the most important aspect of the instrument, which is fair enough I guess - I kind of do the same - but it's not all I'm about as a drummer and I think it's just his perspective. It's one way of looking at things for sure - considering the mathematics behind the beats and using that as a way of analysing feel etc. Generally I prefer just to feel. But when I think of it putting the two together has to be the best way. Feel what you want to play but understand it as well. There's nowt wrong with that.
Right, I've just decided I'm gonna start posting random facts about the days. I can't discuss my feelings on everything but if I at least document the facts of what I'm doing it'll give you a chance to say 'oh yeah, I mind doing that!'. So here we go:
- Mum, Dad and Dan went Christmas shopping today. That's not terribly relevant but you followed them to Livi on your way to college which was funny. Although we were following a lorry which was not. Dad practically skipped a red light at West Calder cos it was so slow going through it haha. Oops, there I go again. Feelings.
- I've got a lesson tonight with one of our students, Conner. Cool.
- I've got law class at 2. Tuesdays at 2. Cool.
- I'm meeting a bass player who contacted me about being a part of my band for solo performance. He says he's quite into playing prog and is cool with the set I've got so far (Sound of Muzak, Subdivisions, Golden Rule, Universal Mind, Schism) so that's cool too.
I think that's all I need to say for now. Oh also, level (incidentally Levels by Avicii came out just a few months back and is probably your favourite song of the year. I've also loved 'Call Me Maybe' by Carly Rae Jepsen (yeah, I'm a big gay but you probably still are too). It's gotten a bit old now but already gives me waves of nostalgia for the summer just gone), Hannah (again, one that everyone knows, just forgot it before) and, well there's loads of 4 letter ones which I won't bother mentioning after this one. Boob. Heehee.
Monday, 12 November 2012
The start of an era... Perhaps.
So here we are. My first ever personal blog. If you are reading this I will assume one of 3 things:
1. You are me in the future and reading this to remember what life was like when you were 23 - the most likely scenario given that is the point of this blog. This being the case - hey future me. How's things? Still got a memory like a sieve? Aye, thought so. It's a good thing you thought to start this blog all those days/weeks/months/years/decades/centuries (we've not yet ruled out rapid cell regeneration yet) ago.
2. You are a strange visitor who by some horrible turn of misfortune has arrived here and is wondering who the hell I am. This being the case - welcome. I'm Davey Stu (a derivative of David Stewart - we're clever about nicknames here), I come from Lanarkshire in Scotland and I'm a musician, among other things, and am still not quite sure who I am or what I'm made for (another reason for starting a blog!).
3. I've (finally!) gotten famous and my fans from around the world are googling my name in a desperate need to find out everything about me. In which case you are in the same boat as 1 and have actually come to the right place.
So right now, after 7 years of Primary School, 6 years of High School, A failed year at uni studying Biomedical Science, 2 years at Motherwell College studying a HND in Popular Music and 2 years down in London studying drums, songwriting and creating music, we now find ourselves at Edinburgh College (previously Stevenson College) finally doing our degree year. Finding it a little stressful, but still confident we'll get by. You're currently pondering as usual whether you're going into too much detail and taking up too much of your time. Probably. You're good at that.
Wait. I'm not sure how to refer to us. You are me in the future. I am me now, right? I keep wanting to say we though. This is getting confusing. If I say 'I' you know I mean you in the past. And 'you' is me in the future. 'We' will refer to something that applies to both of us. Got it? Nah, me neither.
Anyway I've also started teaching in the last few months. It's going fairly well and I'm alright at it I think. Hopefully you'll be a bit better though. I had a lesson tonight with a kid I'm teaching - him and his sister, although his sister was ill tonight. They're the ones I struggle with most. For some reason I never feel like I can justify what I'm teaching. But then I say to myself 'hey, you're the teacher! Do what you want!' I think I am moving a bit fast with some things though, and I'm not sticking with topics long enough. I'm jumping about too much. I hope to fix that though. We're gonna start focusing on single topics in each lesson and I'm gonna give proper exercises to nail things down. Boom.
I'm rambling again. Too much detail, I know. It doesn't help that I'm always in my own head, and the minute I start rambling I feel the need to mention that, then mention that I mentioned that I was rambling, then mention that I mentioned that I mentioned that I'm rambling etc etc. And I'm rambling again. What a vicious cycle. As Chris would say it's completely 'meta'. I'm still not sure if that's a technically correct term haha. Do you know future Dave?
Also do you still love palindromes? I love them right now. I keep looking for them haha. I've also been cataloging them in my mind. Here's the ones I've learned (and remembered) so far: race car (everyone knows that one), refer (I used that up there ^), solos, kayak, radar, rotor, Cilic (Marin, the tennis player haha), Salas (Marcelo, the former footballer) and I think that's it for now. If I think of any more I'll mention them. :)
Right I'm gonna stop talking now. Typing. Whatever. In my head I'm talking. I hope we'll keep this up. It gives me some sort of purpose in life, which I generally lack haha. Saying that, I'm eating into valuable pokemon time! I hope you're still playing. It does waste a lot of time but it is a lot of fun and it's kind of a part of us I think. Well me it is anyway.
Anyway, am aff. Catch ye son!
1. You are me in the future and reading this to remember what life was like when you were 23 - the most likely scenario given that is the point of this blog. This being the case - hey future me. How's things? Still got a memory like a sieve? Aye, thought so. It's a good thing you thought to start this blog all those days/weeks/months/years/decades/centuries (we've not yet ruled out rapid cell regeneration yet) ago.
2. You are a strange visitor who by some horrible turn of misfortune has arrived here and is wondering who the hell I am. This being the case - welcome. I'm Davey Stu (a derivative of David Stewart - we're clever about nicknames here), I come from Lanarkshire in Scotland and I'm a musician, among other things, and am still not quite sure who I am or what I'm made for (another reason for starting a blog!).
3. I've (finally!) gotten famous and my fans from around the world are googling my name in a desperate need to find out everything about me. In which case you are in the same boat as 1 and have actually come to the right place.
So right now, after 7 years of Primary School, 6 years of High School, A failed year at uni studying Biomedical Science, 2 years at Motherwell College studying a HND in Popular Music and 2 years down in London studying drums, songwriting and creating music, we now find ourselves at Edinburgh College (previously Stevenson College) finally doing our degree year. Finding it a little stressful, but still confident we'll get by. You're currently pondering as usual whether you're going into too much detail and taking up too much of your time. Probably. You're good at that.
Wait. I'm not sure how to refer to us. You are me in the future. I am me now, right? I keep wanting to say we though. This is getting confusing. If I say 'I' you know I mean you in the past. And 'you' is me in the future. 'We' will refer to something that applies to both of us. Got it? Nah, me neither.
Anyway I've also started teaching in the last few months. It's going fairly well and I'm alright at it I think. Hopefully you'll be a bit better though. I had a lesson tonight with a kid I'm teaching - him and his sister, although his sister was ill tonight. They're the ones I struggle with most. For some reason I never feel like I can justify what I'm teaching. But then I say to myself 'hey, you're the teacher! Do what you want!' I think I am moving a bit fast with some things though, and I'm not sticking with topics long enough. I'm jumping about too much. I hope to fix that though. We're gonna start focusing on single topics in each lesson and I'm gonna give proper exercises to nail things down. Boom.
I'm rambling again. Too much detail, I know. It doesn't help that I'm always in my own head, and the minute I start rambling I feel the need to mention that, then mention that I mentioned that I was rambling, then mention that I mentioned that I mentioned that I'm rambling etc etc. And I'm rambling again. What a vicious cycle. As Chris would say it's completely 'meta'. I'm still not sure if that's a technically correct term haha. Do you know future Dave?
Also do you still love palindromes? I love them right now. I keep looking for them haha. I've also been cataloging them in my mind. Here's the ones I've learned (and remembered) so far: race car (everyone knows that one), refer (I used that up there ^), solos, kayak, radar, rotor, Cilic (Marin, the tennis player haha), Salas (Marcelo, the former footballer) and I think that's it for now. If I think of any more I'll mention them. :)
Right I'm gonna stop talking now. Typing. Whatever. In my head I'm talking. I hope we'll keep this up. It gives me some sort of purpose in life, which I generally lack haha. Saying that, I'm eating into valuable pokemon time! I hope you're still playing. It does waste a lot of time but it is a lot of fun and it's kind of a part of us I think. Well me it is anyway.
Anyway, am aff. Catch ye son!
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